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You Only Live Twice (1967)
Rate:
3
Viewed:
1/11
1/11:
The phrase of "sex object" has never been more pronounced in a James Bond film than You Only Live Twice.
It's amazing to watch the famed character to seduce one woman after another with zero feeling or care. He's such a major poon
hound. I mean, look at the movie poster. There are a total of eight women surrounding James Bond.
Meanwhile, You Only Live Twice is a dull film with nothing to offer, save for the revealed identity of Number One, the
underworld boss of the SPECTRE organizaton. But it's only Donald Pleasence. Whoopeee deee dooo...not.
The formula is exactly the same as the previous four installments: James Bond is handed the details of his assignment, travels
to another country, observes what's going on, gets into some small fights, obtains what he needs to advance, discovers the
hideout, is trapped, escapes via deus ex machina, finds himself in a tough fight with the bodyguard/number 2 man and
wins improbably, has an easy time killing the major boss, and saves the world with three seconds left while sleeping with
many beautiful women as possible.
Hey, fellas...this crap is already boring. Even sillier is when Sean Connery pulled off the Marlon Brando trick by impersonating
a Japanese. Did the filmmakers expect me to believe it? He's too big and tall to pass for one. Another fatuous moment is
when he and his Japanese female sidekick walked to the top of a volcano without food or drink. Then, she went back to seek help
and then swam across some body of water with, again, no food or water. Did they expect me to believe that, too?
Notice how the same Japanese female was made to wear a two-piece white bikini which turned out to be hmm...clean and bright the
entire time. There's an inactive, completely hollowed out volcano that starts to produce lava at the end of the film. Let me
repeat that: it's an inactive, completely hollowed out volcano that starts to produce lava at the end. Is the movie
meant to be an insult to my intelligence?
The white cat certainly looks abused. I can see his alarmed reaction to one of the explosions. On the other hand, I
lipread many actors, but the lines don't match what they're saying. Obviously, there's heavy dubbing going
on. Disappointingly, Sean Connery is lifeless as James Bond. The only good part is when Number One said to his henchman, "This
organization does not tolerate failure," and then boom...he's gone just like that. I actually like the opening credits which
is cool as always.
All in all, I can see why James Bond flicks like You Only Live Twice made great fodder for Mike Myers when he created
the Austin Powers franchise.